Bad Hair Day
by: Hos Solo

Verse 1: Lemme tell ya little story near and dear to my heart, there’s so
many bad examples, I dunnow where to start. Hard-
core disregard for what’s in style, perhap_ssss con-
sider my message delivered bold in all cap_sss...

You’ve_got_bad_hair, someone’s gotta say it, might
sound like a diss, but I swear it’s legit. You’ve got a
shaved head (yay), but only one dread (eww), if you’ve
got a shred of hope, gotta shed that doo... and you!

You’ve got a mullet, 10-90, ape drape, like a
redneck cape, your hair’s escapin from your face! You look
like Chuck Norris, alot like Zack Morris, a torrent
of dated forest flows away in disgrace.

Billy Ray Cyrus and Macguyver homozygous,
Business up front, party in the back, not stylish.
Duck Tails... ooo wooo ooo! Don’t braid it!
Rat tail’s a fail, yeah, socially abrasive...

Sorry ladies, but a bob ain’t cute, and neither
is a bleach blonde with the jet black roots, it’s a
bummer when you got a butt cut, or a skullet, like a
mullet, social plummet like an emo swoop. If you’ve

got a flock of seagulls frolickin on your noggin better (mine mine mine)
find yourself a barber. Falic Folicles are out man,
Crimps? More like a cabbage patch disaster, from
here on after, lay that style to pasture,
(1 Measure Breakbeat)

Chorus: Oh no, not another bad hair day...
Done it this way for years, don’t know no other way...

Verse 2: Now don’t
copy Rihanna, stay away from Madonna, steer clear (Mr. DJ... Vogue...)
of Lady Gaga, their styles? You don’t want em, got
lines in your sideburns? You’re name’s A-nilla Ice, mice
nest disguise implies you might have lice (ugh) Suff-

fice it to say Kid-n-play’s mad days have
surely gone away, just like teased up bangs, a milli-
gram of sense says if you’re bald, just shave it! Or
wear it like Picard, Patrick Stewart’s a pimp! Or

Soul-glo, jerry curl, greasy geek sheik, that’s
weak, get a faux hawk, and roll with me, but no
frosted tips, or I’ll call you Seacrest, you’ve got
no defense bro, you’re ugly condensed. A

poodle perm’ll land you on Legally Blonde with
Ammonium Thioglycolate you’ll look like the dog, or
maybe Michael Bolton, Weird Al, or Lionel Richie, maybe
MJ, or Bon Jovi, ooo! Or Kenny G!
(1 Measure Breakbeat)

Chorus: Chorus: Oh no, not another bad hair day...
Done it this way for years, don’t know no other way...

Verse 3: Oh
no! Not a bowl cut! Time to get your top chopped!
Beehive, streamline revive your design and lop the
Trump comb over AND the white boy knap, oh
snap! Not a Snookie Poof, I’m not down with that. OH

NO, not corn rows, mixed with a fro! Now
shave it off, maybe a Mohawk will go with the
little that’s left, bereft of any style, I
got it, dip your head in some acid and call it quits kid....
(1 measure breakbeat)

Chorus: Oh no, not another bad hair day...
Done it this way for years, don’t know no other way...